Phallophobia
by lilacbird
Summary: It's super effective! Black suffers from a rather embarrassing fear. Black/N oneshot


**So I finally buckled and wrote some M-rated Black/N. While this is borderline PWP, it's not at all sexy, since it's from N's perspective. Science is beautiful!**

**Warning: ~*PENISES*~**

Sometimes N found it hard to understand Black. As his initial guide to human society, N assumed that he possessed an intricate understanding of conventions and normalities expected of young men, but sometimes it seemed that he possessed even less common sense than N himself. N couldn't understand why he would order extra-spicy food just to make sure it was spicy enough, then refuse to eat more than a few bites because he worried about the effect the extreme heat would have on his throat. Or why, at Christmas, he insisted on buying White a jacket a size smaller than the one he knew she was, claiming it was polite.

Though Black had been the one to gently ease N into a more physically intimate relationship, after eight months of being officially 'together' he had yet to reach a ground on which he was comfortable. N could empathize to a certain degree – the whole concept of a sexual relationship was, initially, alien to him, as was his entire attraction to Black. Attraction, N knew, was simply the first step in humanity's complicated mating ritual, inevitably leading to sexual intercourse, spurred on by the primal instinct that all living creatures possessed to reproduce. But he couldn't reproduce with Black, and still touching, being touched, felt so good he could hardly stand it. Black's hot hands burning his skin, squeezing his flesh, stroking and tweaking, N couldn't help but squirm and arch his back and make noises he didn't even know he was capable of.

"You s-s-sound like a guinea pig," Black said. Black didn't make such noises. When N clumsily moved his hands over his body, he would sporadically turn tense then limp, and his breathing would accelerate into ragged gasps – but that was all. The most N could get out of him was a quiet, breathy moan. Even with Black being naturally quiet, but it was quite clear that Black did his best to keep any sound he might make to a discreet minimum. That was understandable to N; Black was a modest person, and of a more nervous disposition than N. It wasn't unusual for him to show slightly more restrain. It was only after a few months that N became concerned.

Black liked N to be above him when he touched him, legs spread and straddling his hips, ass pressed firmly into Black's crotch. N didn't mind being on display for Black, though his face would light up with a blush. He liked watching those hands tease up his thighs, under his shirt, agonisingly slow. But for all Black would caress his body, there was one part of N that he very pointedly avoided. Whenever his hands would hover just a little too low, he would snatch them away, and distract himself with a pinch or a squeeze that would make N choke and cry out.

Through a childhood spent caring for abused, distrustful pokemon, N had learned that distraction could often be a symptom of something else, and he had the scars to prove it. He knew fear when he saw it. A strong sense of responsibility and the need to protect filled N; if Black had been abused, he certainly knew how to deal with it. Many laws of the pokemon world could also be applied to humans.

Knowing Black was far too dense to understand the art of indirect questioning, N decided to ask him straight out, deciding the risk was worth it. Surely, Black trusted him enough to be honest with him.

"Are you afraid?" he asked.

"Of what?"

"Male genitalia."

Black jaw, working on a piece of raspberry bubblegum, abruptly stopped. He swallowed it before answering. "J-Just a little."

"Oh," N replied, nodding. That was easier than he'd anticipated, and with Black's honesty making him bold, he decided to further satisfy his curiosity. "What happens when you go to the bathroom?"

"I-It's different when it's y-your own!" Black said defensively. "Plus you d-d-don't have to look at it if you sssit down."

N suddenly reached out an gripped Black's shoulders. "Please tell me who hurt you!" he said in earnest. Black's lips tightened and he took a step back, trying to shrug off N's hands.

"What d-do you mean?"

"I-I know if you've had bad experiences in the past it can affect your behaviour in the future... but you can tell me, so-"

"N, you're being weird again."

"I am not!" N dramatically thrust himself away from Black and crossed his arms with a 'hmph'. "I just want to help."

Black simply sighed and pressed a palm to his forehead. "Yeah, I know. B-But there's not really any d-d-deep meaning to it, I don't think," he explained. "Don't you ever get nervous or...?"

N remembered a dark room, a locked door, being cold. Sometimes, when he fell asleep nestled comfortably in Black's arms, he would wake up in the middle of the night and find himself frozen because Black wasn't there any more – only to find that he had rolled over one time too many in his sleep, and fallen out of bed. Sometimes, when he fell asleep, he would wake up in the middle of the night and forget where he was.

"But I have reasons for those," he said, and Black suddenly looked inexplicably guilty.

"Well. I don't," he said helplessly.

"But that doesn't make any sense," N pointed out.

"I-It's a phobia! It's n-not supposed to make sense. It's an-an-an _irrational fear!_" Black cried. "I-I'm sorry... It's not you, I, I _want_ to, but..." He hid his burning face in his hands. "Oh man, this is ssso stupid."

"I don't think it's stupid," N said. "I was only bothered by it because I thought it might have been a result of something bad. I'm not sure what but – don't smile like that! I could protect you, I _could_. Don't laugh at me." He furrowed his brow and looked away sulkily. One of the things he had found hardest to accustom to in human society was the readiness to disagree that people possessed. After a lifetime surrounded by people who shared and cultivated his ideals, it was rather a shock to his system to find people disagreeing with him, and worse, to find that they actually made a convincing argument. N was not a child, and he would not be treated like one, but sometimes the urge to sulk was too great to force back.

"I'm not laughing," Black assured.

"Good. I don't want to be angry at you," N said. He smiled. "Since I love you. You light up my life because you're an ampharos."

Black hissed in a deep breath through his teeth, one eyebrow falling, the other raising high on his forehead. "Where d-did you – never mind. You're such an... argh!" He reached up, quick as a flash, and caught the nape of N's neck in the bend of his arm. Forcing N's head down to his stomach, he hardened his hand into a fist and proceeded to rub the knuckles of his middle and fore finger fiercely against the top of N's head. N wailed as his knees buckled into the uncomfortable position, tears springing to his eyes.

"You're so cruel," he sniffled when Black released him, red-faced and eyes cast sideways. Clenching his jaw, he lifted his hands to stroke up N's thighs and slip under his shirt, caressing the smooth skin of his hips and causing a ripple of goosebumps to break out over N's body. "Mmm. You're not fair," he moaned, bowing his head to rest his forehead on Black's shoulder. "Not fair."

"Yeah, yeah, I'm a b-big bully," Black agreed. N bit his neck and he yelped.

N winced. "Sorry, was that bad?"

"N-Not so hard, please."

N pulled back to examine the tiny purple ring of teeth marks on Black's skin. Licking his lips nervously, he brushed his teeth against the spot. "Is this better?" he asked, voice muffled against Black's neck. Black let out a contented sigh, slipped his hands into N's tangle of green hair, and the conversation was forgotten.

It wasn't a difficult problem to work around. Eight months into an official relationship, and N was proud at having brought Black to orgasm a grand total of four times. Not counting the first occasion, two of those times N required Black's hands on his, guiding him, and the other consisted of N on his hands and knees, hot, flushed and desperately squeaking into a pillow as Black knelt behind him, squeezing, spreading and thrusting against his clothed ass. Still, N couldn't help but feel triumphant, as Black also had quite the aversion to revealing himself too much.

N was a little nervous himself, when, with trembling hands, he unzipped the fly of Black's jeans for the first time. There were so many factors one had to consider in such a situation, the prominent one being how he could make Black feel good. N's touches were clumsy and inept at the best of times – how could he possibly advance to the next level so quickly? Black tried to set him at ease by saying N had already reached boss level, and N blushed, knowing this was probably Black's way of complimenting him in a language he didn't quite understand.

When, after a bit of fumbling and a few pained choking noises from Black, N finally managed to work down the elastic of Black's underwear, his childish curiosity returned and, forgetting his original goal, he eagerly positioned himself between Black's thighs, leaning down to that his head hovered over him, eyes wide. N had never seen a penis that was not not his own in such close proximity before. He touched it, and Black flinched.

"Y-You gotta keep your he-e-ead down there?" he asked in a strangled whisper.

N didn't reply. He swallowed and wrapped his shaking fingers around the hard appendage, and was a little disappointed to find that it felt very similar to his own in that respect. Carefully, he slid his fingers up to the tip, his skin just barely brushing against Black's, light as a falling leaf. He knew he had to be very gentle. Erections were very serious natural occurrences, and N had heard that because of the mounting pressure inside the penis, caused by increased blood-flow, the stiffness made it possible for the poor organ actually _snap _if one was too rough. The very thought made N shudder, and he knew better than to mention the little pearl of wisdom to Black.

Doing his best to banish the painful thoughts from his head, N pressed the pad of his thumb gently against the sensitive tip of the penis, where he knew the majority of nerve endings that stimulated sexual pleasure resided. Black arched his back and dug his hands into the sheets where he lay on the bed, gasping. Beneath the slender fingers that encircled him, N felt a prominent pulse. He raised his eyebrows. Fascinating.

"It's a little different to mine," he told Black, carefully guiding his erection to one side, then the other as he examined it. Shuffling onto his knees, he slipped his free hand up to meet the other, and experimentally pressed a finger to the small pad of skin located just behind the testicles. The perinium. Bare legs tightened around his hips, and Black inhaled sharply.

"D-Don't! That's..."

"Sorry," N mumbled, taking his hand away, embarrassed at his own actions. Had he hurt Black? The testes produced produced several million sperm a day; N had never tried to touch his own, but all those tiny cells wriggling around inside would surely make the skin quite sensitive. N recalled an incident when he had attempted to climb his basketball hoop to retrieve a ball that had become stuck. He had fallen, and his feet twisted under him when he landed. The heel of his shoe had connected strongly between his legs, and he'd cried all day.

"Did I hurt you?" he asked fearfully.

"Uh. No," Black replied, draping an arm over his eyes. "N-N-No, I'm fine.."

"But you sounded hurt."

"I was just surprised! I wasn't expecting you to – ahh..." He flung his arm away from his face in frustration, making N flinch. "D-Do we h-ha-ave to have a conversation with you holding onto that?" He gestured to his nether regions, pointedly averting his gaze.

"But it's so strange," N said innocently.

"Oh, thanks."

"No, no, I mean!" N shook his head, flustered. "It's bigger than mine. Can I compare them?"

Black's jaw trembled as he stared at N with bulging eyes. His face was turning redder by the second. "N-N-N... _No!_ No, you can't! Let go of me!"

"P-Please don't be angry! I just wanted to – you're shorter than me, so why would yours be bigger? Maybe it's a result of selective breeding."

Black grabbed a pillow and clutched it over his face, muffled whining noises escaping from behind it. N's straightened up in surprise. "Oh! It got soft."

"Of course it did!" Black snapped, hurling the pillow at N's face and snatching up his underwear, forcing N to relinquish his grip. N rubbed his throbbing nose and sniffed, making Black heave a sigh. "Hey, don't get upset. What am I supposed to do with you, huh?"

N sat back dejectedly on the bed, legs spread straight either side of him like a plastic doll. "I failed, didn't I? I'm worthless," he lamented. Black let out a snort of laughter, and N barely had chance to voice his indignation before his ankles were seized and wrapped around Black's waist as the younger man slid his hips snugly between his thighs. N hid his face against his shoulder.

"Mm, Black," he murmured.

"What?"

"I am humiliated."

Black laughed again, and N pinched his arm hard.

"Ow! Now _that_ hurt," Black said, and pinched N back. "You d-d-deserved that!"

N scowled and rubbed his backside protectively.

"It didn't hurt that much, you baby," Black said, rolling his hips teasingly against N's, eliciting an anxious squeak from gently parted lips. N bit his lip, feeling the erection that was growing in Blacks pants pressing against the cleft of his rear. Black looked almost apologetic, then leaned in to kiss him. "Look, we have to start ag-gain now."

N didn't mind letting Black dictate their actions in the bedroom, mainly because were he left to his own devices he knew for certain that he would do something that, whilst making perfect sense to him, would be considered inappropriate in the real world. When, with the lower half of Black's body draped over his knees, he finally brought Black to orgasm, N couldn't understand why Black was so embarrassed. Yes, a little semen flecked onto his cheek, but he didn't see the problem. All it took was a quick wipe of the back of his sleeve, but Black acted like it was the end of the world and dragged N to he bathroom, insisting he washed his face. He scrubbed the skin of his cheek so thoroughly that N felt his skin was surely being stripped away. His face glowed pink for hours.

After that, Black switched back simply thrusting his hips against N's until he reached his climax. If N were ever to turn the white brightness that filled his head into something resembling a thought, he was sure he would be embarrassed to be seen dry-humping like a pokemon in heat. Black was adamant that they only ever do such shameless things with the two of them alone in the house, and for once N was grateful for his paranoia. Even with Black's unusual fear playing it's part, he could make N's body burn in ways he'd never known. It was so new to him. It was understandable he would react in such a way!

Determined to further satiate his curiosity, N turned to the library and the miracle of free wi-fi for his educative purposes. After learning that he wasn't meant to end up upside-down and half hanging off the sofa after a particularly bad bout of squirming brought on by having his nipples pinched, he decided to take an extended break from his studies, but not before expanding his knowledge on psychological phobias. He refused to give up on Black. How terrible it must have been for him, to have such an extreme aversion to a part of his own body!

N learned about the place males used to engage in sexual intercourse with each other. When Black was hovering over him, he slipped a hand down the back of his underwear and touched a single fingertip to it. Black had done a similar thing to N on several occasions (though always after a lot of hesitation, and always when N was fully clothed), and he didn't seem to mind. So, taking the advice of the all-knowing internet, N stuck his finger in. How Black shrieked! Such an unnecessary fuss, N thought, and Black only made it harder for him to withdraw the offending finger by turning as rigid and taut as a tight rope on top of him. It was only later that it occurred to N that instead of dragging Black back from the brink of fear like he'd intended, he had pushed him back into it.

He was a failure! A miserable failure!

"You're s-s-sulking again," Black said.

"I'm not," N sulked.

Black sat down on the sofa beside him, pulling on his socks. "You really shouldn't do that."

"I'm not sulking, I'm contemplating," N said seriously. Turning abruptly, he closed his hands around Black's wrists and pushed him down on the cushions, kissing him clumsily.

"Woah! Oh God, I've created a monster," Black said, grinning and raising his hands to hold the back of N's neck.

"A-Are you scared of me?" N's face flushed scarlet at the boldness of his own actions, and he knew he looked ridiculous.

"You? You're such a wimp," Black joked. Lifting one leg off the floor, he wriggled it under N to lie comfortably at his side. "What's brought th-this on?"

"Don't make fun of me, Black."

"Is this ab-bout that whole... thing with the – _don't!"_ Black slapped a hand over N's mouth, essentially preventing him from helpfully providing the latter half of his sentence. "I-I-I'm sorry okay. It's not _you_."

"I just don't like you to be scared," N said, prising Black's palm from his face.

"I-I can get used to it. I'm better than I used to be, believe me." Black's hands slid around to rest on N's cheeks, and with a lick of his lips N brushed off his nerves and took hold of Black's legs just under the thighs. Black breathed in a long gasp as his knees were pushed up to his chest. "N..."

Biting his lip, N attempted a cautious roll of his hips against Black's body. Black choked, arms flying up to cover his face.

"I'm sorry!" N whispered, mortified. He hadn't meant to become aroused!

"S'okay," Black mumbled, keeping his eyes locked firmly to the floor. "I d-don't mind the feel of them so much."

Half-whimpering, N gently rubbed himself against Black's vulnerable rear. "Black," he begged, making sure to add a whining edge to his voice. When he did that, he discovered, Black usually let him have his own way. "Black, please."

"I never get a break, do I?" Black muttered, and bucked his hips encouragingly against N's. This was the permission N had been waiting for. Pulling away slightly, he gripped Black firmly by the waist and yanked him back to thrust desperately against his elevated hips. He could feel Black watching him as he moved.

"Black, don't look," he whimpered.

"You c-c-can't tell me what to do." A teasing smile graced Black's lips, and N had to jerk his head away, eyes tightly closed.

Just as the pathetic squeaks that had been building in N's throat began to shamelessly pass through his lips, N opened a single eye... and was greeted by two other eyes located across the room, huge, black and staring. He screamed and let Black's lower body drop back onto the sofa with a gush of air.

"Oh _nooo!_" N wailed, fumbling simultaneously between trying to cover both his face and his quite visible erection.

"Esme!" Black rolled off the sofa and ran on his knees to chase the perpetually grinning Darmanitan out of the room. "Aw, man."

"She saw! She saw everything!" N half-sobbed.

"It's okay, i-i-it's not like she can t-tell anyone," said Black feebly. He nudged N's shuddering shoulder.

"Get your bum out," N cried.

"_What?"_

"That's what she said to me!" He hid his face in his arms. "I'm a disgrace to pokemon."

Black raked a hand through his hair. "Okay, okay, Miss Drama Queen." He paused. "D-Did she reallysay that?"

N nodded, and Black pursed his lips. "Whatever. I-It's probably a good thing she s-s-stopped us; you know I have to get going. And you need to get out of the house before my mom gets home!"

"But your mom likes me," N said.

"Yeah, b-but if she knows you spent the nnnight here, she'll get the wrong idea." Black picked up N's shoes and waggled them in front of N's face. "D-Don't let White, Cheren or B-Biaaanca see you leaving, either!"

After that incident, the two of them seemed to switch roles, and it was Black immersed in research. Though he tried to hide it, N would often find him with his eyes glued to his computer screen. One evening, when he and Black were alone in his house (Black's parents had opted for a weekend alone now that their baby was eighteen), N crept up behind Black and loomed over where he sat on the sofa, absorbed in a medical book. He snapped it shut so fast that he caught his nose between the pages.

"Sorry! I-I was just..."

"I know, it's okay," Black groaned, holding his poor red nose. He laid the book out flat on his lap and beckoned N beside him. "Y-You wanna know what I'm doing?"

N nodded.

"Well, I was thinking that m-m-maybe if I can get my head around the sciencey part, then maybe I'll be ok-kay," Black said sheepishly. "It's... not going so great. How do you do it?"

"Do what?"

"It's just a body part to you, isn't it?" Black shook his head, a disbelieving smile on his face. He placed his hands on the book, then burst out laughing. "I-I-I can't even open it!" His smile gradually faded into nothing. "Ugh... I really suck."

Silently, N reached out and opened the book for him. Black looked at him.

"Thanks," he murmured. He held out his arm, and N slipped under it, snuggling up to him. His hand tightened on N's shoulder as he skimmed through the book to find the page he was obviously memorised. N knew it as getting close when Black's turning of the pages slowed.

"Black..."

"No, I want to do this." Black nodded determinedly, and swept away the final page with a dramatic flourish, accidentally hitting N in the face as he did so. "Sorry."

Sticking his tongue out to taste his stinging lip, N's gaze skittered towards to page. He frowned. That wasn't right – the illustrations shown didn't look like real male sexual organs at all. They were simply scientific diagrams, clearly showing the anatomy of the penis, testicles and all their surrounding features, clearly labelled for all to see. Black noticed N's look of uncertainty, and sighed.

"I w-working my way up, okay? There are ph-photographs on other pages," he said. He took hold of N's hand as he bravely scanned the page. "These ones aren't so bad," he eventually decided.

"Should I turn the page?" N asked.

"No, I can do it." Black's fingers trembled as he leafed through the book, and he gasped and snatched his hand away, as if he had touched something dirty, when a much more realistic representation came into view. He laughed nervously, squeezing N's hand. "I-I'm not usually... I'm not like this with my own!"

"I know, you told me," N said.

"And it g-g... gets worse." Black buried his face in N's shoulder. "I don't wanna look," he whined.

"You don't have to."

"Yeah, I do." His vice-like grip was cutting off all the blood flow to N's fingers. He couldn't turn the page himself, so N did it for him, and was assaulted by pictures that showed the erection process step by step.

"Oh, it's like wikipedia," N said helpfully. "Black?" He tried in vain to unhook the arms that had thrown themselves around his neck. Black's bruising grip only tightened, and N winced. "Let's close the book, Black."

"No."

"Please-"

"_No_." Black tilted his head away from where it was hidden on N's shoulder. "Just... don't let go."

The sound of the television faded into nothing in N's ears, leaving only the slight blue glow illuminating the room, reflecting off the pages open on Black's lap. Slowly, he lifted his limp arms to wrap around Black's back. His body felt so small and thin in N's arms. N had never really noticed the size difference between the two of them before.

Black breathed heavily as he slowly inched open one eye, then the other to examine the page. N rubbed his back comfortingly, and slowly the tension in Black's trembling body lessened.

"I must look pretty stupid here," Black said amusedly.

"You don't."

"Thanks. You're wrong, but thanks." He sighed. "Y'know, they're not... t-terrible. Once you get used to them. And-and-and if I can get used to looking at a st...ranger's dick, then it should be easier with... your, um..." He turned back to N, lifting his legs to drape them over N's lap, letting the book fall to the floor. "I love you."

"I love you too."

"What time is it?" Black pulled away and checked his watch. "Ahh, when did it get so late? How long were we d-d-doing that for, anyway?" He staggered to his feet, stubbing his toe on the open book in the process.

"Can I stay?" N asked hopefully.

"You know you can. Just keep out of my parents room."

It wasn't uncommon for N to spend the night at Black's house, and it had been months since they'd abandoned the mundane ritual of pulling out the futon from under Black's bed for N to sleep on. N chronically twitched in his sleep, but as long as he had the warmth of Black's body pressing against him, he could avoid thrashing around too much.

Black tossed a maroon T-shirt at N's head as he rooted through the closet in his room while simultaneously worming out of his jeans. Black usually slept in just an old T-shirt and his underwear, and N was happy to copy him, though he had never heard of changing into a different set of clothes just to sleep in before. Taking off his overshirt, he folded it neatly and hung it over the back of Black's office chair before sitting down and starting on his pants. His eyes widened as a firm warmth pressed against his back. Black's arms slid under his, hands pressing against his chest.

"Black, are you okay?" he asked.

Black pressed his cheek against N's back. "I'm still shhhaking." He laughed softly and tweaked N's nipple through his shirt, making him gasp and double over. Black swiftly fell back into position, sliding his knees either side of N's hips and pressing both hands against his chest so that he slotted neatly against his back. N stiffened, feeling heat rise in his cheeks as he felt Black's growing erection pressing into the small of his back.

"What are you-" N's legs fell open of their own accord as Black ghosted his hands up his inner thighs, and his protests caught in his throat only to be replaced by a long, shuddering sigh. He watched with flickering eyes as those quick, nimble fingers stroked up and down his body, brushed over the hard, sensitive peaks of his nipples, before sliding down and finding the zip that N had already half undone.

They stopped briefly as Black prepared himself, then bravely dipped down to cup N through his underwear. N gasped fully, hands clawing at Black's legs at his sides.

"Black," he whispered.

"Should I stop?"

"N-No, it... I like it, but-" N swallowed. "Aren't you scared?"

"I told you, I don't mind the feel so m-m-much. I don't... do you mind if I don't look?" Black kissed his ear, then sucked on it, making N whimper. "I want to make it good for you."

"Mmm." N squirmed. "You'll make me embarrassed."

"Sorry," Black said. "Turn around."

He released N and shuffled back to allow him room to turn to face him, before plunging his hand in again, quickly, before he could change his mind. N couldn't hold back a strangled cry. It felt different to when he experimented with touching himself like the advice pamphlet told him to. He reached out to grip Black's upper arms as the hands nervously felt around, growing accustomed to their new habitat.

"Um. C-Come here..." Black shifted so that he laid back on the duvet, and N found a little comfort in this familiar position. Routine could always be relied upon. Hesitantly, N crawled over Black's body so that the two of them were face to face.

"Oh," he squeaked when he felt the pressure against the front of his underwear return. He looked at Black pleadingly, and found himself gazing into deep brown eyes from which fear was slowly dissipating and being replaced by a warmth that sent hot pleasure rippling through his body, adding to the heat that would building up inside him.

He spasmed when Black slipped his hand under the elastic of his underwear. "Ah,ah-" Black's hand, warm and slightly damp, curled around him. "_Ahh!_ Black!"

Black let out a breathy chuckle, his own face bright red. "D-D... Do you like that?"

N could only nod in response, lips tightened and eyes squeezed shut. Black reached up with his free hand to brush a stray lock of long green hair away from his face. N allowed himself to relax a little, and as he looked down at Black, with his dark eyes and slightly crooked eyebrows and gentle, expertly-perfected smile, as saw a twinge of fear twitch his eyes.

"I don't think I can move," he admitted. He attempted a quick, jerky motion with his hand, and N hissed in pain. He stopped. "Sorry, I... If-if you could..." His free hand tugged at the back of N's pants, then dipped beneath the band of his underwear. N's back arched as Black's palm pressed flat against his buttocks, squeezing lightly, urging him to move. He bucked his hips instinctively, and cried out as a wave of pleasure shot through him.

"Keep doing that," Black said, eliciting a needful whimper from N. He continued to thrust helplessly into Black's hand, gasping, trembling, face flushed with pleasure. He was burning up. Every slight brush of Black's nervous fingers caused a wave of tingles to caress over his whole body, and when Black lifted his shirt to gather just below his collarbone, N shuddered fully at the sheer sensation of skin on hot skin.

"Do it more," N whispered, only vaguely aware of what he was saying as he gazed heavily down at Black, who was both smiling and biting his lip, beads of sweat causing his feathery brown hair to stick to his forehead. N's bucking hips picked up their pace. "Do it more, do it more, do it to me..."

Black's hand, hidden in N's underwear, slid over N's erection, thumb pressing against the very tip. N tried to remember what that place was called. It was simple anatomy and he knew that he knew it, but in the haze of his mind it was impossible to locate even a single coherent thought. Black leaned up and kissed him. Kissed him, bit his lower lip and sucked on his long, slender neck. N arched his back, giving Black access to the curve of his body as he trailed a single teasing finger up his chest to the hard bud of his nipple.

N could feel his mouth moving, but he wasn't sure he was saying anything. If he was, he was certain he wasn't making a scrap of sense. The room around him was blurring, and it was only him and Black and nothing else and it was too much and he couldn't stop, he couldn't stop, he couldn't stop...

"Black," he choked out between laboured breaths. Fear crept into his voice. "Black, help me. I can't stop."

"Th-That's okay," Black said, reaching up to cup N's heated cheek. "You're okay."

"I-I'm scared," N whimpered, unable to cease the desperate thrusting of his hips. "I'm scared!"

"Shh." Black curled his fingers into N's hair, and N cringed and hid his face against Black's neck, ashamed. Black was the one with the phobia, and it was N's responsibility to help him, not further fan the flames of fear with his own silly anxieties. Black kissed his ear. "You'll be... f-f-fine..."

"I'm not – ah!" N's body jerked. The muscles of his legs ached but he couldn't stop moving. Something was building up inside him. Something was going to happen to him. Something was happening to him.

He hit his climax with a long, shivering gasp, his whole body convulsing. His arms finally gave out, and he collapsed in heap on top of Black's half-naked body. He rolled his head limply to one side to look at Black's rather shaken expression.

"Oh," he whispered. "Oh, I... I didn't think it would feel like that."

Black nuzzled his nose affectionately into N's hair and stroked his cheek, wiping away a tear that N hadn't felt escape his eye. His hand was still hidden in the now-wet underwear, fingers uncurling weakly.

"I-" He took a deep breath. "I-I still can't move my hand. Help me?"

With a faraway feeling in his head, N was only half-aware as he rolled off Black and helped him removed his damp hand from his underwear. Black sat up immediately, making the mattress bounce. N groaned.

"Oh, wow, what?" Black mumbled. "It's see-through."

N blinked through the fog that had appeared in front of his eyes and saw that Black's hand was coated with a clear, watery fluid.

"Is that bad?" he asked. His voice came out a pitiful squeak.

"Nnno, it's just mine's white," Black said. He held his hand out in front of him at arm's length. "I'm going to get washed. You should come t-t-t-too."

N struggled to summon the strength to move as Black left the room. He stumbled after him like a lost puppy, careful to keep his legs sufficiently apart to stop his semen leaking out of his underwear. He kept his back to Black as he showered his sensitive lower half, unsure on where Black now stood on his phobia.

"Have you established control over your fear now?" he asked, dabbing himself down with the towel and wincing.

Black laughed sheepishly. "I d-don't think so. I was pretty nervous back there and I couldn't even see your..."

"You should have told me!" N said, turning to frown at Black.

"I wanted to do it. So don't you feel bad, okay?" He kissed the nape of N's neck. It was the only place he could reach, considering their height difference. "Still... put your pants back on b-b-before you come back, okay?"

N did as he was asked before returning to the bedroom, now mercifully much steadier on his feet. He sat down on the bed next to Black. Crawling one shaking hand across the bed, he wrapped his fingers around Black's.

"Are you sure you're all right?" he asked.

"Are _you_ all right? You sounded kinda..."

N felt his face heat, and his snatched his eyes away. "I-I... I liked it..." he mumbled, fidgeting slightly. Black rested his head on N's shoulder, and N smiled weakly as soft brown hair tickled his nose. His gaze slid from the top of Black's head to across the room. He barely heard Black's breathy whisper of "Sssso glad my parents aren't here" as the large, smiling eyes of Black's darmanitan fell into view.

He fell off the bed with a scream.

–

**Aww, Black's stutter is almost completely gone... it's a little sad, but there you go.**

**Well, what can I say, for a near PWP I had tremendous fun writing this! It felt very awkward including scientific words in sexual scenes, but since this story was from N's perspective, albeit in third person, it wouldn't feel right to use certain colloquialisms.**

**As for Black's phobia, I doubt it's as uncommon as he thinks!**


End file.
